Ultimately, I wouldn't say London is my favourite city, but rather, a city that grows on me bit by bit. Perhaps it's the distance from home, or perhaps its the mix of foreign faces that make me feel - in a way "same but different". I still remember that hour into landing at Heathrow, sitting in Nicholas' car, drawing on the condensation of his car windows as I drowned out the conversation I left him and Bobo to. Barren trees, melancholy blue-grey skies; gloomy much? It was nothing like the London I envisaged in my mind before I embarked on this trip.
But these things grow on you the more you spend time in the city.
- Cheap food doesn't come easy - 3 pounds for a cold deli sandwich? That could get me a hearty plate of rice here with much meat and warm vegetables.
- Sales are fantastic - seriously - Jordans under $200?
- Crossing roads without caring about the traffic light, but rather "should we, do we, could we...CROSS!!" is a more common phenomenon than us waiting for the light to go green.
- Homeless people - Questions that ran through my mind were: why were they homeless? I mean yes, housing is indeed expensive in UK, but seeing them in their sleeping bags and hoards of towels to keep warm, sometimes I can't help but to think why can't they get a job. Yet, the fact that they still have the awe and wonder to read a book amidst the wintery weather amazes me. Perhaps they once lived in a cozy warm home, with someone to educate them how to read. Perhaps they once had a go at life, but fell short and gave up in some point in time. While our episode at Paddington, every time we went back to Peking-Seoul, there was this one homeless guy who asked us for loose change, always smiled at us in recognition as we walked along Praed Street to catch Bus 23 back to Ladbroke Grove, and even laughed with us at our shenanigans and boisterous laughter like drunkards (note: we were not drunk).
- Middle-eastern people - I think these people are commonly misunderstood or perhaps stereotyped into the fact that even though their countries are in a disastrous state with the ISIS issue an all, the fact that they are of a certain faith does not make them scarier/dangerous/less friendly. Back when I visited the US, I think the stereotype was more serious, with white supremacy ruling, but here in London, I love the fact that they embrace people of colour - Indians, Chinese, Lebanese etc. And I would have to say, that even though we met lots of kind, lovely and helpful people on our trip, the Middle-eastern people albeit guarded (when asked personal questions like which country they were from - perhaps of fear of stereotype); were the ones who extended the kindest hospitality and conversations to us. Firstly, was this man at a dessert store in Doha who gave us free generous samples of his nut candy because we were simply browsing and asking each other what that was. Secondly, the falafel guy in Paris who gave us 2 falafels for free just so that Bobo and I would stop quarelling. Thirdly, the uber driver who generously shared of his life in London, and how much we should appreciate a life back in Singapore.
Moments in London were fleeting as were the day light hours, but memories fade and I wonder when will the next time be when I return. How would the city have changed? Would kimchi stew still report to work at 6:30pm? I cannot say I fell in love in London, as that moment was just a temporary crush on his cute boyish looks - something to fill my time perhaps, or to give me something to look forward to. But at times back here, I can't help but wonder - what is he doing now? He should be working now right? Oh, now is the time we usually eat dinner! Oh, the sun should be setting right now. I guess it's not right to live in the past, but I guess i never had proper closure other than the point where I sat at Au Veux de Colombier people watching while Bobo went to visit "her office" i.e. the toilet, and I really relished in the moment that there I was 20, in Paris, enjoying a wonderful meal with one of my bestest friends - in a city of beautiful people, beautiful architecture and perhaps the air of slow living - something distinctly different from that of Singapore. At that point, I needn't care about what modules I was going to take, whether I could go on exchange, whether I could cope with schoolwork, whether I could get a job, and whether I could have a better future. All I needed to do was - be Parisian for that few hours and get myself safely back to London.
When I was 15/16, I still remember writing the essay on my favourite city - at that time Rome - because of inspiration from reading Eat Pray Love. And I imagined myself riding a bike through the cobbled-stoned paths in the city, buying bread from the many Patisseries back to my apartment and perhaps enjoying evenings with a cup of hot cocoa, enjoying views of the cute bronzed boy with tousled hair and stylishly dressed outfits across the road. Oh what a life! But as I type this, its 1:15am in Toa Payoh, and I have a class at 8:30am tomorrow. How different reality is from our dreams. But then again, could I really survive there? Is this all a facade in my mind? When I read about the bombings in Paris, the prejudice of women in Europe, I cannot fathom it in such a sheltered country like Singapore where we see none of this things.
Somehow or rather, i guess this trip has changed me, increased my yearning to go back to Europe to revel in the awe and wonder of a country so rich in history (although I was yawning away in museums), to eat away and walk through each city by foot. All dreams aside, I'm kinda disappointed as my hopes of going to Europe for exchange seems dimmer each day, and as much as Korea is an option, I hate to disappoint my Dad - haven't even studied for GMAT now that we talk about this.
Either way, God, I pray that you lead the way. Lead my life in the direction that you deem fit to be fitting for Your purpose for me. Lift up my spirit and help me not to be so downcast - for in You I gain strength for each day. Amen.
