The Jack of All Trades, Master of None.

So here I am listening to Transatlanticism by Death Cab for Cutie, while the whole world must be mugging their hearts out.  Even XY is studying. And I'm wasting away. Last night at 2am, there I was lying awake for the first time, contemplating upon my complexities and incapabilities. Dark thoughts, for a dark night. Apparently my 15 hour sleep fest from the day before led to this temporial insomnia. So taking a quick perusal over the close to 18 years of my insignificant(?) life, what significant achievement have I done? What am I good at? What will I be good at? What achievement will I come to attain? And I came up with close to nothing as an answer. "If life were a card game, the jack of all trades is one of the worst cards to be in life." Heard this somewhere, from someone, and if I faintly recall it might be my mom. "You're good at everything, but good at nothing." What a paradox. Ha. That's it, my existence is a paradox. I still remember Alayne lamenting about not being good at anything while I'm multi-talented - able to play the piano, able to do draw well, excelling in academics. But yet again, nothing lasts forever. As we all grow older, our talents and abilities get shaped defined and moulded from the raw stones we once were. However, with stark talent showing, my talent has been reduced to something subtly mediocre or worse than that. My music abilities seem limited to that few songs I can string on the piano, my drawing is an utter farce compared to people out there who have honed their skills through time, and my academics seem like a road leading to oblivion. At times, I'm thankful for not having such starkly definite polarisation of skills, yet, sometimes I wish I had just one exceptional talent that supercedes those of others. Do I dare complain of being mediocre. Not really, but sometimes I still do. Limitless wants of a human. Imperfections nigh infinite. What's new.